What You Think Matters but Doesn’t, and What You Don’t Think Matters but Does

What You Think Matters but Doesn't, and What You Don't Think Matters but Does
Listen to Episode 336 of the Bridechilla Podcast

Here’s what you’re overthinking (and shouldn’t) and what you should be considering instead

Meghan Ely, OFD Consulting

Weddings are simply not what they were 5, even 10, years ago (except for mason jars- those just don’t seem to go away!). These days, it’s all about the couples’ comfort, and rarely does anyone turn their nose up anymore at breaking tradition or going rogue when it comes to the smaller details.

That being said, have you ever witnessed a friend overreact over a detail that you would never lose sleep over, or vice versa? Each couple is different when it comes to how they want to spend their big day, but these pros are weighing in on the reality of what to worry about – including when you might need a reality check.

Bridechilla What You Think Matters but Doesn't, and What You Don't Think Matters but Does


What you’re overthinking

Again, it’s a different cup of tea for everyone that chooses to prioritize certain elements over others, but this is for those that may not see the bigger picture. Joan Wyndrum of Blooms by the Box says this is true in the case of trying to match exact colors across the board.

“Whether it’s the bridesmaid dresses, table linens or invitations, trying to match them to your flowers will prove frustrating and futile due to the natural color variation in flowers. Color variation is what makes flowers beautiful!”

The thought of your wedding timeline might be enough to send you into a panic, or have you reaching for the nearest bottle of wine. Paulette Alkire of Chalet View Lodge shuts down that common fear, saying,

“As soon as couples begin the planning process, they stress about making every decision right away. My advice is to take a step back. Look at the big picture. What are the most important aspects of planning to tackle? Which ones are most time-sensitive?” 

She heavily recommends mapping out a budget first, then securing details second. You’ll be thankful you kept yourself in check – there’s no strict time constraint on when you have to get married.

As Kevin Dennis of Fantasy Sound Event Services likes to say, we’re in the era of ‘Pinterest Prejudice.’ There’s a very high standard that we hold ourselves to, and it can create a lot of self-inflicted pressure.

“We do our best to recreate a couple’s vision within their budget and logistics, but many times our couples worry that it won’t look exactly the same and the guests will know. When in reality, the guests have never seen the inspiration photo and will be blown away by any type of lighting and decor that’s present. They don’t know that their inspiration photo was 100 Edison lights but the couple only could afford 20 – they’ll just see the 20 and love them!”

Megan Velez of Destination Weddings Travel Group agrees.

“Many people envision their wedding and can’t deviate from that vision when the big day comes, no matter how trivial the detail. Couples tend to think every detail (including the smallest ones) are all of equal weight and importance. But the fact is, they’re not!”
what you think matters Bridechilla

Photo by Elizeu Dias 


What you’re not thinking enough about

It’s easy to get lost in the details that you’ve been compiling over the years, especially the visual aspects that make this day your dream wedding. However, if any number of horror stories don’t convince you, then we will. It takes only one misstep to bring your big day from luxurious to lackluster.

Brittny Drye of Love Inc. says that logistics reign supreme.

“Timelines aren’t the sexiest thing to talk about when it comes to weddings, but they’re the foundation to running a smooth operation day-of. If you haven’t hired a planner, be sure your venue has a coordinator or put a trusted loved one in charge with specific instructions.”

Rest assured that guests don’t forget easily when a detail goes awry.

“People remember experiences. The quality of the food, the band, and whether or not everything was easily understood and manageable. Did they have fun? Was the transportation timely?” 
What matters bridechilla

Think about your priorities

Emily Sullivan, owner of Emily Sullivan Events says of these key points. Make sure you’re concise and prompt, and always prioritize the food and entertainment.

No matter your budget or imagination, your wedding day can’t succeed without a great staff. Lauren Lemke, lead planner at Amy Abbott Events says support is key to pulling an event off seamlessly.

“Most couples go to events and see the end product with the tables all set and the music playing. They don't realize the amount of labor and prep that goes into creating the perfect atmosphere. Tables and chairs need to be moved in and set, food needs to be prepped, lights need to be hung, sound systems placed. A wedding can be a major production.”

Let’s face it, there’s no real right or wrong to planning a wedding, despite what we’ve been engrained to think by scrolling through picture-perfect Instagram nuptials. However, what you pay attention to really matters, and most of your stress boils down to not prioritizing the proper details. Think about your wedding as if you were an attending guest, and pace yourself! Remember the real reason why you’re getting married and ditch the idea of perfection.

Meghan Ely is the owner of wedding PR and wedding marketing firm OFD Consulting. Ely is a sought-after speaker, adjunct professor in the field of public relations, and a self-professed royal wedding enthusiast.

Leave a Comment:

Leave a Comment: